Relationships are no walk in the park. In fact, as well as being full of love and joy, they require a lot of effort on both sides to make everybody happy. So it’s always great when we of hear simple, easy ways to keep insecurities at bay.
New research has revealed that asking your partner one specific question on a daily basis can improve your relationship – and that question is simply ‘how are you?’
A new study conducted by the University of Waterloo has revealed that the question can help an insecure partner feel cared for. The research suggests that this is the best way to get through to a partner that is insecure, as often, they reject any compliments and reassurances given to them as their brain automatically believes it to be untrue.
While this is of course hard for them, it is also very challenging for the partner doing the reassuring, as constantly telling someone something they’re struggling to believe can be frustrating and tiring.
Therefore, showing your partner you care by asking a mundane question like ‘how are you?’ on a daily basis could actually be the most effective method, as it makes them feel loved and cared for consistently, despite what the little voice in their head is telling them.
In order to get this conclusion, the researcher’s surveyed 359 adults in relationships between the ages of 18 to 66. They found that the level of relationship satisfaction in those who described themselves as insecure to begin with increased as soon as their partner started to ask them how they were and inquired about their day regularly.
Overall, the research highlights that it is more important for those feeling insecure in a relationship to see their partner is showing curiosity towards them (by asking about their day etc) than to receive compliments and straight verbal reassurance.